I can already imagine the dirty looks and the racing
thoughts as people scroll past this title and think to themselves “what kind of
blog entry is this…”. Ironically, the old me might have thought the same thing
for a moment and maybe I would’ve even chuckled to myself about it. But oh how
I’m thankful that times have changed. I am extremely fortunate because when I
was introduced to our cycle from mother nature, by my own mother, it was
presented as a positive process that we go through as women that enables us to
carry and have our own children. I grappled with this idea but ultimately I
didn’t agree to it, especially since the world around me had a much different
perspective and attitude towards a women’s period. Most of my friends would complain
about feeling moody, craving junk food, having cramps, having chest pain, back discomfort,
leg cramps and feeling tired. It wasn’t long into my own experience that I
struggled with the same symptoms before and during this monthly time, sometimes
I even got sick as I’m sure many other women can relate to. But what was even
more negative about this monthly experience was my perception of it, as I grew
to hate the onset of my period and consider it a curse that women have to deal
with unfairly in this life. I started to internalize other’s comments I would
hear, about how disgusting having a period is and this was ultimately how I
characterized it for myself. Mother nature’s burden made it hard to perform in
my sports, an inconvenience when I’m out with friends, a worry related to my
options for clothing to wear, and more. It makes me sad to think I spent so
much time dreading this gift of femininity and I hope this entry can help some
other women see the other side, see that this monthly bleeding is actually the
most beautiful gift of all.
Did you know that in many other cultures, women’s periods
are celebrated and viewed as divine? I’m not
claiming to be a scholar in this area of research, I have just taken one
course at University and done some online research. But this is what I have
learned so far, and I think we would all benefit from reading. For instance,
one tradition with Native cultures involved the women who were menstruating to
go to a separate lodge during the heaviest days of their period to connect with
other women and relax. Most women were on their periods at the same time due to
the community closeness and connection with the moon so the lodges were often
full of many women at the same time. The women in some of these cultures were
also to stay away from men during this time because it is sacred and causes
imbalances in power relations. The women were not expected to participate in
ceremonies or group relations during
their time because it was a time for inner focus, not outward energy sharing. The
Cherokee believe menstrual blood is the most powerful source of feminine
strength, and could provide protection from enemy forces. Many of the native
cultures believe that the menstrual cycle, also referred to as the moon time,
is a period of inner purification, of releasing and shedding the old which
correlates to the shedding of the uterus. The Indigenous people viewed their
women as equal, as powerful life-givers, LEADERS in their communities and the
glue of the families in their tribes. It really wasn’t until colonization that
many of these traditions and the respect given to women was muted if not
completely consumed by the violence and control imposed upon these peaceful
communities. This is just some brief insight into the history and beliefs of
culture’s separate from my own experience and I’m sure there is much more to be
known, as well as many more places around the world who view the women’s cycle
as a beautiful process.
The menstrual cycle is often referred to as “moon time”
because ancient beliefs correlate the stages with the phases of the moon in
typically 28 day cycles. Since women lived in close harmony, many of them
ovulated and bled at the same time each month. Historically many women were
most fertile during the full moon which was associated with the increase light
from the sky and reflection on the plants. These women also typically bleed
during the new moon, and this pattern is called the White moon cycle. Ancient
folklore claims that women who have this cycle are focused on motherhood either
and their period is a time of inner retreat and rest. While a Red moon cycle,
where women bleed during the full moon and ovulate during the new moon is
associated with being a healer, wise women or shaman. The focus of their
intuitive energy during their period is outward- through sharing and teaching. These
women may be more focused on creation, community healing, a new creative
business, etc.
Likewise, there are also ancient beliefs that the moon phase you
are born in correlates to the time you were fertile. So if you were born during
a new moon, often it is believed you will be most fertile in your life during
the new moon phases as well. This isn’t always the case, and don’t be alarmed
if you research and start to track your own cycles and they don’t line up with
these views. It is possible though that if you focus on creating more balance
and tuning into your body consistently that your cycle will begin to line up
with the phases of the moon. Obviously a lot has changed with our modern
lifestyles, artificial lighting, eating habits and more so the synchronicity
with others isn’t as evident as possibly our ancestors. I always did find it fascinating
though that my best friends who I was around consistently would always get
their period at the same time as me, as I’m sure many of the females reading
this can also relate to. As long as your
cycle is consistent and not causing you too many symptoms then there is
nothing to worry about, it is perfectly right for you. If you are dealing with
severe PMS and very painful periods I really recommend you invest some time
into reading and meditating to connect with your deeper self. Also exploring
eating and exercise habits that you engage in on a daily basis, and journaling
what changes you make to see how they
affect you. I can honestly say I made some
changes in my life that have exponentially helped me during my menstrual cycle,
so much so that I really don’t have any physical pain or symptoms for the past
three months during my period.
1 . I have decreased the amount of intense exercise
I engage in and balanced it with hot yoga. This also means that right before
menstruation when I feel that really tired feeling I limit all the activity I
engage in.
2 .
Switching to whole-foods for most of my snacks
and daily intake (fruits, veggies, nuts, whole-grains) I cut back on meat A LOT
(1-2 x/week I’ll eat chicken or turkey, no ham and no red meat
3.
Maintained a regular sleep cycle: I used to stay
up all hours of the night, sleep in some days, rise early on the days I had to
and I was really exhausted. I now sleep
amazing usually by 10:30- 11:00 pm and I wake up happy before an alarm between
6:30- 7:30 am. Obviously this isn’t maintainable for everyone but prioritizing
sleep is a crucial step towards showing your body love.
I swear by the changes I’ve made, I used to get severe back
pain, chest throbbing, cramps and more. Now I only occasionally get a light
dull back ache and a slight headache. Anyways I got a bit off topic with the
original direction of this blog entry which was to help you open your mind and
possibly re-frame how you view your cycle. Instead of dreading the onset of
your period, start calling it your sacred time. Start giving yourself extra
relaxation and self-care time. For me, limiting my social obligations in the
pre-menstrual and menstrual phase is a must because although I am always
exhausted from superficial social interactions, I actually can’t handle it at
all during my most vulnerable time.
I ordered a book by
Alexandra Pope called “The Women’s Quest” which is an amazing workbook with
exercises for you to focus on each month in various phases of your cycle that
support your self-reflection. The more you work through the exercises and stay
consistent with your journal, the more aware of your energy you become and it really is the
most beautiful feeling. You start to recognize just by turning inward where in
your monthly cycle you might be and how it is affecting your thoughts,
priorities, presence and focus. These are the observations I have made in my
own cycle through this book’s guidance and my dedication to investing time to
self-reflect and answer the journal questions. There are 12 sessions, so it’s a
year process and you focus on one guide
each month, I’m moving onto guide 5. Again I am not claiming to be an expert whatsoever,
this is just my own experience combined with some light research to analyze how
I feel at various times in the month and what I relate those feelings to. In my
journal I have explored the phases on a much more personal level, in depth.
However here I’ll just provide some general insight into basic observations
I’ve made so far.
1.
Post-Period/Pre-ovulatory: The word I would
describe this time is calm. I found I have more of an interest in focusing on
fruitful connections, developing trust and progress forward. I find myself very
peaceful without any real traces of anxiety, this can be related to estrogen
and progesterone being the lowest during this time. In this phase I am more
open to future possibility while also being patient in what I believe is meant
for me. My pre-ovulatory mind is: open, loving, thoughtful, tranquil and quiet.
I find it funny that I can also connect my phases to different interests in my
music, and during this phase I really love dancehall music.
2.
Ovulatory: The word I would use to describe this
time is engaged/connected. I feel an increased desire to seek emotional
closeness and well as physical closeness. I feel more motivated to get ready,
go out and I feel an increase in confidence especially in social situations. I
feel an anxiety that is strong for a pursuit of some positive forward momentum
to manifest into some physical changes in my life. This can also be related to
hormonal changes as estrogen rises, which can contribute to an increase in
anxiety. I feel like I always need to be doing something, investing in progress
and making efforts to improve my life. This time of the month I usually spend
extra time planning long term goals and imagining the future. My skin usually
is glowing during this time and I experience way less breakouts except sometimes
the hormonal changes can cause a couple noticeable spots. The music I found
that I like during this time really rotates between all types, usually upbeat
dancehall and hip hop.
3.
Pre-menstrual: I found that I seek out comfort
in solitude more. I have no patience for superficial social time. My body and
soul is calling for surrender, stillness and slowness in daily living. I find
that constantly reminding myself that this is my sacred time and it is
indefinitely valuable to me. There is a lot of hormonal changes going on as
progesterone has increased by now and you may even begin to feel more hot during
this time because your core temperature is increased through this hormone. Likewise
this is the time of the month where many women experience moodiness, random
anger, etc and severe PMS(pre-menstrual syndrome) is actually associated to a
hormonal imbalance, when there isn’t enough progesterone. Sometimes breakouts
increase and stay into the next phase however changing my intake of daily foods
has tremendously helped me with skin issues. I definitely notice a shift in
food cravings, usually for sweet treats and sometimes salty but since changing
to a whole-foods lifestyle focus they have also decreased tremendously. I don't drink at all anymore, but choosing to cut back or completely eliminating alcohol intake ESPECIALLY during this time is also a very positive choice. I tend
to like slower music such as happy reggae or soulful r&b.
4. Menstrual: I can almost always predict now a day/night before the release is going to occur and I can’t really put into words why/how, I just know. Let’s call it a women’s intuition. A huge release of tension and emotional anxiety accompanies this period of time for me. This is likely associated to the balancing of the hormones which are also at low levels during this phase. I consciously choose to give my body the extra rest it needs especially during the transition from pre-menstrual to menstrual. Focusing on eating foods that don’t include meat especially during this time can help your symptoms, as well as avoiding salty foods so you limit bloating. It’s also amazing how much more intuitive I feel during this transition, my dreams are much more vivid and I can finally remember them again. Likewise I feel like I can pick up on people’s subtle energy changes a lot more easily so it’s important for me to visualize a protective bubble around my own energy. I cut down on my physical activity for a couple days and also drink more fluids. During this time I often like to listen to music such as: Ed Sheeran, meditation flow, etc.
It really is incredible when you direct your attention
internally to learn more about yourself. It might be overwhelming at first to
focus on changing your entire view of your cycle especially if you always had a
negative orientation towards it. I hope in the future we can, as mothers, consciously
choose to discuss and teach our daughters about the beautiful process their
bodies go through each month, because there is no better word to describe our
moon time. Mother nature blessed us with this beautiful pattern in our lives
because we are life-carriers, life-givers and life-sustainers. How beautiful is
it that our body creates and maintains a rhythm that is specific to us as unique
women. If your cycle is not regular or if you
don’t even experience a period that is okay, that is what you need right
now and you can still focus inward to
connect more to your femininity
and explore your connection with yourself. Likewise, this entire self process
does not really work if you are on hormonal birth control because these
substances block our bodies natural feedback loops and ultimately impact way
more than our ovulation. This is also a topic of exploration for another day,
but I highly recommend that you take some time to research more and then make
an informed decision for your health on whether
hormonal birth control is
necessary in your life. There have been links to strokes, cancer, blood-clots
and death- so even if you don’t have an extreme negative outcome think about the stress you are placing your
body under. You may experience side effects that are unwanted at first if you choose to detox from hormonal birth
control, but like everything, in time it will pass. In this modern time we have
become so unconnected to our bodies that when we experience anxiety, negative
physical manifestations and more we may not understand that we have the amazing
ability and power to turn inwards. Mother nature’s bleed is going to be with
you for many of the years of your life, it is not a curse, it is not a burden,
it is one of our greatest blessings and all you are required to do to embrace
this view through changing your frame of mind. Bleed on sisters, it is truly
beautiful <3 xoxo
As always please don’t hesitate to message me if you want to
talk about this or any other topic.
Ash
